Sunday, April 22, 2007

I am Swiss Cheese - April 18, 2006

So, I met my new oncologist today and I’m feeling a bit like Swiss cheese after my appointment. He is a small man, who wears silver jewelry and a leather necklace (I liked him right away) and joked around about putting vodka in the syringe that held the anesthesia.

It must be a powerful thing to tell a strange woman you’ve never met to strip and she just does it. Anyway, after apologizing sheepishly for affronting the staff with my thong, I got the full skin exam and ended up with three moles (one in my hair by my ear) frozen off, two removed with a scalpel and two more biopsied. What FUN!! Personal humiliation AND needles. Woo hoo!! My surgery date for the melanoma is next Thursday and I’ve been prescribed a lovely sedative to take the night before and the morning of. I really like this guy.

So I’m looking like I got in a fight with a dull Gillette with little round band-aids all over my body, but I feel like I’m being handled very well. Oh, and speaking of being handled, he also groped my lymph nodes. Very exciting for mid-morning.

(It doesn’t look like he’s willing to do a saddlebag-ectomy while he’s removing the cancer, though. Darn.)

So there’s the update! The house is almost finished…just a few more days! I’ve put out an all call to the Broad Cast Network (the network cast of island broads) to come have a paint party tonight so I’m hoping for good progress and good times tonight. But not as good as last night, though, I hope. My friend Robin stopped by last night looking all gorgeous in her work clothes and we drank wine until midnight contemplating the meaning of life and size 15 jr.’s pants --- uggh. I think I’ll be sticking to the diet coke tonight, thank you very much.

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